Lori McCommas: Her Life Before and After Marrying Terrence Howard

Lori McCommas became known to the public through her marriage to acclaimed Hollywood actor Terrence Howard, but her story extends far beyond being someone’s ex-wife. Born in New York City, this strong woman navigated the challenges of being married to a rising star while maintaining her own identity and raising three children. As a devoted mother, her journey reflects resilience, strength, and the complexities of relationships in the spotlight.

Despite facing significant challenges including domestic violence and two divorces from the same man, Lori emerged as a figure of quiet dignity. She chose privacy over publicity, focusing her energy on creating a stable environment for her children. Her life demonstrates that strength often comes not from seeking attention, but from protecting what matters most.

Today, Lori lives away from the media glare, having successfully built a peaceful life centered on family values. Her story serves as a reminder that behind every celebrity marriage are real people facing real struggles, and sometimes the bravest choice is to walk away and rebuild.

Quick Bio

Early Life and Background

Lori McCommas was born on June 22, 1969, in New York City, where she grew up in a middle-class family that valued education and good behavior. Raised in a household that embraced the Jewish faith, she was surrounded by family traditions and a community deeply rooted in its customs and values. These early influences played a significant role in shaping her worldview and personal character, instilling in her a sense of dignity and resilience that would serve her throughout life’s challenges.

Her educational journey began at Henderson High School, where she demonstrated a commitment to learning and personal development. Following high school, she pursued higher education at the prestigious Pratt Institute in Brooklyn, New York, a well-known art and design school renowned for its creative programs. It was during her time at Pratt that her life would take an unexpected turn, setting her on a path she could never have anticipated.

While at Pratt Institute, Lori embraced not only academic pursuits but also the cultural experiences that come with college life in New York City. The diverse environment and creative atmosphere of the institute helped shape her into a well-rounded individual. Though she would later choose to raise her children in the Jehovah’s Witnesses faith, her Jewish heritage remained an important part of her identity and family history.

Meeting Terrence Howard

Lori McCommas and Terrence Howard’s story began at Pratt Institute in New York City, where both were students in the early to mid-1980s. Their paths crossed in the creative and vibrant atmosphere of the institution, and they quickly developed a connection as college sweethearts. At the time, Howard was far from the household name he would eventually become—he was just a regular student trying to find his way in life, and their relationship blossomed during these formative years when dreams and aspirations were just beginning to take shape.

The young couple’s romance evolved from college sweethearts to a serious commitment. They were young and full of dreams, sharing the hopes and struggles typical of young people finding their way in the world. Lori fell in love and saw something special in Terrence, supporting his ambitions even as he worked toward breaking into the competitive entertainment industry. Their bond deepened over time, built on shared experiences and the optimism of youth.

In 1989, Lori and Terrence decided to marry, taking their relationship from dating to a lifelong commitment—or so they thought at the time. She was just 20 years old when they tied the knot, ready to embark on married life with the man she loved. Neither could have predicted the tumultuous journey that lay ahead, filled with both joy and heartbreak that would test their relationship in ways they never imagined.

Life as Terrence Howard’s Wife

As Terrence Howard’s career began to gain momentum throughout the 1990s, Lori found herself in the role of a supportive wife and eventually a devoted mother. The couple focused on building their family together, and between 1993 and 1997, they welcomed three children: daughters Aubrey and Heaven, and son Hunter. Lori’s primary focus became being a good mother, raising their children and maintaining the household while Terrence pursued his acting ambitions, taking on various television and film roles that gradually built his reputation.

The early years of marriage brought the typical challenges of any young family, amplified by the demands of the entertainment industry. Lori worked to create a stable home environment for her children despite the unpredictable nature of her husband’s career. She focused on taking care of her home and tried to keep the family together, making the decision to raise their children in the Jehovah’s Witnesses faith and providing them with the spiritual foundation she believed was important. This required dedication and consistency, especially as the family navigated the pressures that came with increasing public attention.

Behind the scenes of Terrence’s rising fame, Lori was managing the day-to-day realities of family life. She attended to the children’s needs, maintained their home, and tried to preserve normalcy despite her husband’s growing celebrity status. However, as Howard’s career continued to ascend, cracks began to appear in their marriage that would eventually become impossible to ignore, setting the stage for the difficult years ahead.

The Troubled Marriage

The marriage between Lori McCommas and Terrence Howard was marked by serious challenges, particularly issues related to domestic violence and Howard’s struggles with alcohol. While everything looked good from the outside, these serious problems created an increasingly unstable and unsafe environment that would ultimately prove unsustainable. Despite Lori’s efforts to maintain the family unit, the situation deteriorated to a point where intervention became necessary.

The most well-documented incident occurred in September 2001 in Pennsylvania, when something terrible happened that changed everything. Police responded to a domestic disturbance call at Lori’s residence after Terrence became very angry during a phone argument. According to police reports, the altercation began with an argument over the phone, during which Howard allegedly threatened Lori, warning her not to hang up on him or he would come over and hurt her. Fearing for her safety, McCommas ended the call and immediately contacted 911 for help.

While Lori was still on the phone with the 911 dispatcher, Terrence arrived at her home and began forcibly entering by breaking down the front door. In a desperate attempt to escape, Lori ran through the kitchen and into the backyard. Howard pursued her, smashing through the kitchen’s screen door to reach her. When he caught up to her, he grabbed her left arm and punched her twice in the face with a closed fist, causing visible injuries.

The violent assault only ended when Howard’s brother was present at the scene and physically intervened to stop the attack. Thankfully, Terrence’s brother stopped this violent act before it could escalate further. When police arrived, they documented fresh damage to both the front door and the kitchen screen door, along with visible marks on Lori’s face and arm. Howard was arrested for this violent act and faced multiple serious charges including simple assault, terroristic threats, harassment, and stalking. In 2002, he pleaded guilty to disturbing the peace, though the other charges were dropped. Years later, in a 2015 Rolling Stone interview, Howard admitted to the assault, saying: “She was talking to me real strong, and I lost my mind and slapped her in front of the kids.”

The First Divorce

After years of trying to make their marriage work despite the violence and struggles, Lori McCommas filed for divorce, which was finalized on March 19, 2003. This marked the end of their first marriage, which had lasted approximately 14 years from their wedding in 1989. The decision to divorce was undoubtedly a difficult time for everyone, especially with three young children to consider, but the safety and well-being of her family had to come first.

The divorce proceedings addressed custody arrangements for their three children—Aubrey, Heaven, and Hunter—who were still minors at the time. Lori focused on ensuring stability for the children during this transitional period, working to minimize the disruption to their lives despite the separation. The financial settlement from the divorce helped provide some security as she adjusted to life as a single mother.

Following the divorce, Terrence Howard made efforts to win Lori back, demonstrating what appeared to be genuine remorse for his past behavior. He purchased a house just two blocks from Lori’s residence in Pennsylvania, positioning himself to be nearby and available. He began doing various household tasks for her, including cutting grass, taking out trash, and helping with odd jobs around her property, showing what seemed like a changed man who wanted to make amends and prove his commitment to being better.

Remarriage and Final Separation

Despite the history of domestic violence and the trauma of their first marriage, Lori McCommas made the controversial decision in a surprising turn of events to give Terrence Howard another chance. After approximately two years apart, the couple remarried on May 25, 2005, wanting to give their relationship another chance. This reconciliation surprised many who knew about their troubled past, but Lori apparently believed that Howard had genuinely changed and was willing to try again for the sake of their family and the love they once shared.

The second attempt at marriage, however, proved even more short-lived than many expected. The reunion lasted only about six months before the fundamental issues that had plagued their relationship came back. Whatever hopes Lori had for a different outcome were quickly dashed as it became clear that they could not fix their relationship and the problems were not truly resolved. The pattern of control and dysfunction that had characterized their first marriage returned.

Lori filed for divorce a second time, and their marriage was officially dissolved on July 15, 2008 (some sources cite 2007). This final separation marked the definitive end of their romantic relationship after nearly two decades of being connected. In later interviews, Howard reflected on their second marriage, stating: “The second time, she tried to control me. She made that awful mistake of trying to rope a bull.” He also admitted that he had pursued her for six years and would “marry her again, to tell you the truth.”

Even after their final divorce, Howard reportedly continued living two blocks from his ex-wife and would often visit, asking her questions like “why did we get divorced?” This demonstrated the complicated nature of their relationship—despite the violence and repeated separations, there remained a connection forged by years together and their shared children. However, Lori had made her choice clear: she would not return to that relationship again, prioritizing her safety and peace above all else.

Life After Divorce

Following her final separation from Terrence Howard, Lori McCommas made a deliberate and decisive choice to step away from public life completely. Unlike many individuals connected to celebrities who seek to maintain visibility or capitalize on their famous associations, Lori chose privacy and peace over fame. She does not maintain any verified social media accounts, does not give interviews to the press, and does not attend Hollywood events or functions where she might encounter media attention. Instead, she focused on living a quiet life away from cameras.

Lori redirected all her energy toward raising her three children and providing them with a stable and normal life despite their father’s fame. She wanted to shield them from the chaos that had characterized much of their early childhood and give them the foundation they needed to become healthy, well-adjusted adults. Her dedication to motherhood and creating a peaceful home environment became her primary focus, and by all accounts, she succeeded in this mission.

The divorce settlement from Terrence Howard provided Lori with financial security, allowing her to focus on her family without economic stress. Various sources estimate her net worth at approximately $2 million, though this figure has never been officially confirmed. She lives quietly in Pennsylvania, maintaining the privacy she values so highly and staying away from media attention. Today, Lori McCommas represents a powerful example of someone who chose dignity and healing over fame and attention, rebuilding her life on her own terms.

Her Children

Lori McCommas and Terrence Howard share three children, each of whom has found their own path in life and taken their own unique direction:

Aubrey Howard – Born in 1993, Aubrey is the eldest of the three children. As the oldest daughter, she witnessed much of her parents’ turbulent relationship during her formative years. Aubrey followed her father’s love for the creative arts and has pursued her own interests and career path outside of the entertainment spotlight, choosing not to follow directly in her father’s acting footsteps. She performs under the stage name “Ayeyo” in her musical endeavors. Aubrey has maintained a relatively private life as an adult, though she has occasionally appeared at public events. She has a daughter, making Lori a grandmother.

Heaven Howard – Born in 1997, Heaven is the middle child and second daughter. Heaven chose a different path and became a model, working in the modeling industry. Like her sister, Heaven has largely stayed out of the public eye despite her father’s celebrity status. She was only about six years old when her parents first divorced, and the instability of that period likely had a significant impact on her childhood. Heaven has appeared in famous fashion magazines while maintaining the privacy her mother values, and limited information is available about her current activities beyond her modeling career.

Hunter Howard – Born in 1995, Hunter is the youngest child and the only son. As the sole male child in the family, Hunter may have had a particularly complex relationship with his father given the documented violence Howard exhibited toward his mother. Unlike his sisters, Hunter has stayed away from the spotlight and has been the most private of the three siblings, keeping his personal and professional life very private and completely out of the public sphere. Very little information is available about what he does today or where he lives, indicating a strong commitment to privacy similar to his mother’s approach.

All three children appear to have maintained relationships with both parents despite the difficult history. They seem to have emerged from their parents’ troubled marriage as well-adjusted adults who have found their own paths in life, which speaks volumes about Lori’s dedication to providing them with stability and love during challenging times.

Lori’s Legacy

Lori McCommas may not be famous in her own right, but her story carries important lessons about strength, resilience, and the courage to choose one’s own wellbeing. She represents countless individuals who find themselves in relationships with domestic violence, facing the difficult decision of when to leave and how to rebuild. Her journey from victimization to empowerment serves as an inspiration to others in similar situations, demonstrating that it is possible to escape, heal, and create a better life.

Her choice to maintain privacy and dignity rather than capitalizing on her connection to a famous actor speaks to her character and values. In an era when many people connected to celebrities seek attention through social media, interviews, or reality television, Lori has consistently chosen a different path. She has shown that there is strength in silence, power in privacy, and wisdom in protecting one’s peace above all else.

Perhaps Lori’s greatest legacy is the family she raised and raising good children despite extraordinary circumstances. Despite the trauma and challenges her children witnessed during their parents’ turbulent relationship, she provided them with the stability, love, and values they needed to thrive. Her dedication to motherhood and creating a safe, nurturing environment allowed her children to grow into healthy adults. This quiet achievement—raising good, well-adjusted children despite extraordinary circumstances—may be her most significant contribution and the truest measure of her strength.

Terrence Howard’s Other Marriages

After his final divorce from Lori McCommas, Terrence Howard went on to marry twice more, with mixed results. His second wife was Michelle Ghent, whom he married in May 2010. Ghent, who had Filipino and White heritage, was reportedly a commercial production employee. Their marriage quickly became contentious, with Ghent filing for divorce in February 2011, less than a year after they wed.

The divorce from Ghent turned bitter and public, with serious allegations emerging from both sides. In December 2011, Ghent was granted a restraining order against Howard after she presented evidence of physical injuries that allegedly required medical attention. She claimed Howard had broken her computer, repeatedly threatened her, and stalked her by phone and internet. In August 2013, she appeared in court with a black eye she said Howard had given her, resulting in a second restraining order. Their divorce was finalized in May 2013, though Howard later contested the settlement agreement, claiming he signed it under duress.

Howard’s third marriage was to Mira Pak (also spelled Miranda Pak), a Korean-American model and restaurateur. They married in late 2013 and had two sons together: Qirin Love (born 2015) and Hero (born 2016). However, this marriage also proved unstable, with the couple divorcing in 2015 after only about two years of marriage. Surprisingly, Howard and Pak reconciled and became engaged to remarry in December 2018, demonstrating the complicated nature of Howard’s romantic relationships. This pattern of tumultuous relationships underscores the challenges that characterized his marriage to Lori McCommas.

Ethnicity

Lori McCommas comes from a Jewish heritage, having been born and raised in a household that embraced Jewish traditions and values. Her family’s cultural background played a significant role in her upbringing, exposing her to a community deeply rooted in its faith and customs. These early experiences with Jewish tradition helped shape her worldview and provided her with a strong sense of identity and cultural connection that she carried throughout her life.

Interestingly, while Lori was raised Jewish, she made the decision as an adult to raise her own children in the Jehovah’s Witnesses faith. This shift represents a significant spiritual journey and demonstrates her willingness to explore and commit to different religious practices. The decision to raise her children as Jehovah’s Witnesses reflected her beliefs about providing them with spiritual guidance and structure, even if it differed from her own childhood religious experience. This choice shows her independence of thought and commitment to what she felt was best for her family.

Net Worth

Conclusion

Lori McCommas’s life story is ultimately one of survival, strength, and the courage to prioritize what truly matters. She entered marriage young and hopeful, only to face challenges that would have broken many people. Yet through it all—the domestic violence, the public scrutiny, two divorces from the same man—she maintained her dignity and never lost sight of her primary responsibility: protecting and raising her children in a stable, loving environment.

Her decision to leave the public eye after her final divorce demonstrates remarkable wisdom and self-awareness. While she could have easily capitalized on her connection to a famous actor through interviews, social media, or reality television, she chose instead to build a quiet, private life focused on healing and family. This choice speaks volumes about her character and what she values: peace over publicity, privacy over fame, and substance over superficiality.

Today, Lori McCommas stands as a powerful example for anyone facing similar challenges. Her story reminds us that it’s never too late to choose yourself, that leaving an unhealthy relationship—even multiple times—is not failure but courage, and that true success is measured not by public recognition but by the quality of the life you build and the family you nurture. Her legacy lives on in her children and in the quiet inspiration she provides to others navigating their own difficult journeys.

Frequently Asked Questions

How many times was Lori McCommas married to Terrence Howard? 

Lori McCommas was married to Terrence Howard twice. They first married in 1989 and divorced in 2003, then remarried in 2005 before divorcing again in 2008. This pattern of separation and reconciliation was ultimately unsuccessful.

What happened between Lori McCommas and Terrence Howard? 

Their marriage was troubled by domestic violence and Howard’s alcohol abuse issues. In 2001, Howard was arrested for assaulting Lori after breaking into her home and punching her in the face twice. He later pleaded guilty to disturbing the peace and admitted to hitting her in front of their children, saying he “lost his mind” during an argument.

How many children do Lori McCommas and Terrence Howard have together? 

Lori and Terrence have three children together: daughters Aubrey (born 1993) and Heaven (born 1997), and son Hunter (born 1995). All three have maintained relatively private lives despite their father’s celebrity status.

Where is Lori McCommas now? 

Lori McCommas lives a private life in Pennsylvania, away from the public eye and media attention. She has no verified social media accounts and does not give interviews or attend Hollywood events. She focuses on her family and maintains the privacy she values, successfully avoiding media attention and living quietly.

What is Lori McCommas’s religion? 

Lori was raised in a Jewish household but chose to raise her children as Jehovah’s Witnesses. This represents a significant spiritual shift from her own upbringing, reflecting her commitment to providing her children with the religious foundation she believed was best for them.

Did Lori McCommas receive money from her divorce? 

Yes, Lori received a substantial divorce settlement from Terrence Howard along with ongoing support payments. Her estimated net worth is approximately $2 million, largely attributed to the divorce settlement and child support payments. This financial settlement has allowed her to live comfortably and focus on raising her children without economic stress.

Why did Lori McCommas remarry Terrence Howard after their first divorce? 

After their 2003 divorce, Terrence reportedly pursued Lori for years, buying a house near hers (just two blocks away) and doing household chores like cutting grass and taking out trash to demonstrate he had changed. Lori gave him a second chance in 2005, likely hoping he had addressed his issues and believing in his transformation, but the marriage lasted only six months before she divorced him permanently.

Den Mark

Den Mark is a passionate writer specializing in celebrity news, biographies, and net worth insights. With a keen eye for detail, he brings readers the latest updates and intriguing stories from the world of fame.